I'm writing this post from a hotel room in Columbia, Missouri. I traveled here today with four teenagers...what was I thinking?
Four weeks ago, our 17-year-old daughter, Erica, told me that she and her friend Elizabeth wanted to give their boyfriends an early Christmas gift. Their favorite group was giving a concert in Columbia, MO and the girls wanted to surprise the boys with tickets.
Columbia, Missouri is a 4-1/2 hour drive from our home in Central Illinois. With the concert taking place late on a Saturday night, the only logical way to make this work was to spend the night in Columbia...and that wasn't going to happen without a chaperon!
"Mom, would you please go with us to Missouri? It's the only way we can make this happen." Honestly, every part of me wanted to say no. November is already a month with a lot of travel and 9 hours in a car this weekend wasn't my idea of fun.
But I remembered something I wrote in my book My Heart's at Home. (Yes, even authors are convicted by their own words!) The question I asked was "Am I a dream-taker or a dream-maker?"
The logical, practical, want-to-make-life-as-easy-as-possible me can easily be a dream-taker. "Mom, can we go play in the snow?" "No, it's too much of a mess." "Mom, can I move the furniture around in my room?" "No, it's too much of a hassle." "Mom, can we go to a concert that's 4 hours away and will require an overnight stay in a hotel and a chaperone to make it happen?" "No, that's ridiculous. You can't do that."
But this time I thought before I answered and talked it over with my husband. How often does she ask for something like this? Not often, we admitted. How many more years will we have her at home? Fewer than we realize. Is there really any reason to say no? We determined there wasn't so we said yes...and since Mark has to preach on Sunday mornings the chaperoning was left up to me.
So we made the trek. They're at the concert and I'm alone in a hotel room. Honestly, that's kind of nice for me! And truthfully, I've enjoyed being with the four of them today! They are four seniors who are ready to take on the world as they enter adulthood! Their thoughts are refreshing, their humor engaging, and their conversations are stimulating. I'm blessed because I said yes.
Are you a dream-maker or a dream-taker? I invite you to join me in becoming more of a dream-maker and enjoying this fleeting season of parenting to the fullest!
5 comments:
I don't actually know you. But I am proud of you anyway. Good choice mom! I hope to make decisions not based on messiness, hassels, etc. but on wisdom and the things that really matter---like time together. Hope you weren't up too late waiting for their return.
This brought tears to my eyes with memories of my four sons! I am proud of you for seeing the forest in spite of the trees. Now that my boys are grown, I don't regret a minute we spent building dreams, and we spent lots of those minutes, hours and days. But, they were all worth it!
What a great reminder! I'm still in the toddler/preschool phase so their "dreams" are a little different now... Its easy to find excuses why I could say "no"... but sometimes its the better choice to just say "yes"! Thanks for sharing!
This is totally relevent when you have a two year old and a one year old. My two year old is ready for adventure...but sometimes I'm not. Thanks fo reminding me the extra work is worth the memories...
Wow! I have caught myself in this predicament far too often and tend to be a dream-taker. I keep telling myself I need to lighten up more often. Thanks for this post...it helps to put things into perspective.
Jennifer
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