I’m guessing that nearly every mom has done it sometime over the past three days.
It’s easy to do. It’s human nature.
Women, particularly, are experts at this kind of comparison:We tend to compare our insides to other women’s outsides.
When we do that, we never measure up. Never.
If you’ve been looking at the pictures of Kate Middleton just hours after birth and wondering what’s wrong with you, you’re not alone.
However, if we insist on comparing, it should be insides to insides. In cases like this, that’s hard to do because royalty works to present only their best to the public. Yet there are some things that are a given with childbirth whether you see them or not:
- I’m quite sure that under her yellow flowered dress she was wearing those sexy mesh panties and a pad the size of a diaper.
- I’m quite sure an ice pack will be one of her best friends this week.
- I’m quite sure that her chest occasionally feels like its going to explode if Charlotte doesn’t wake up and nurse!
- I’m quite sure that she is feeling a bit bleary eyed with lack of sleep.
- I’m quite sure she’s trying to figure out how to balance the needs of a nearly 2 year old and an infant.
- I’m quite sure that as soon as she got in the car after she left the hospital, she slipped those heels off.
Let’s face it, if you and I had our own entourage of hair, makeup, and fashion experts, we could look like Princess Kate did hours after birth. Anyone could.
However, we don’t have someone to do those things for us, so most of us have never experienced looking “public ready” hours after birth. In fact, the beautiful thing is that we don’t have to.
We are able to enjoy the moment, let our body heal, and bask in the joy of the first hours of our newborn’s life without having to be “presentable” to the outside world.
As one friend who I quoted in No More Perfect Moms: Learn to Love Your Real Life put it, “The older I get, the closer I get to figuring out that there is no enviable life out there. I need to pay more attention to the blessings I have and less to the myopic illusion that others are better, and better off, than I am.”
The next time you’re tempted to compare your insides to another person’s outsides, remember that when the masks are stripped away, we’re not that different from each other after all.