How do you make a new friend?

My youngest daughter, Erica, is a just a year into her mothering experience. She’s an at-home mom trying to find her way into new friendships with other moms.

115922307The other day she was at a park where she struck up a conversation with another mom. They enjoyed a lengthy visit while their little ones enjoyed the park.  Erica later asked me about the best way to turn an encounter like that into a possible friendship.  I suggested that she simply say, “It’s been great to visit with you. Would you like to exchange numbers and meet at the park sometime again?”

Sometimes you’ll get a yes and sometimes you might get a no.  And honestly, sometime you might get a yes, but when you text or call to inquire about a play date you might not get a response. Anytime you’re pursuing friendship, you’re always risking rejection. It’s part of the journey.  But if you don’t risk reaching out, you also miss out on possible friendship opportunities.

So how about you?  How have you turned a chance encounter into a friendship?  What advice would you have given to Erica? 

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6 Responses to How do you make a new friend?

  1. Carol says:

    I found that having preschoolers is the prime time to meet new friends. There are tons of things to do w/little ones where you can interact with other moms, and the kids are just happy to have a playmate. Now that my kids are older, I am finding it almost impossible to make friends in a new city. They are active in scouts, church, and a few other things, but those don’t give me the opportunity to sit and talk with other moms. Your advice to Erica was spot on, but what do you suggest for those of us who don’t take a stroller and go to the park anymore?

    • JillSavage says:

      Carol, I’ve found that connecting with the parents of my kids friends on Facebook is a good place to start. Then, of course, you have to risk making the ask to join you for coffee or something like that. Sometimes it works!

  2. Wani says:

    Its hard making friends as an adult. Especially as a SAHM. I usually mention my name and that I’m on facebook and leave it up to the other person to find me if they want to pursue something.

  3. Rob Currie says:

    Jill,
    My suggestion for moms in this situation is to join a group. Some examples of groups would be a Bible study, a play group for the kids, or a MOPS group. Other women will be more motivated to get to know you when they know they’ll see you on a regular basis.

    Rob

  4. You have to be vulnerable to make new friends. I had a lady almost 8 yrs ago strike up a conversation w/me at McDonalds while I was letting my 5 yr old play & nursing my 2 month old. We hit it off from the start, exchanged numbers after talking for hours there letting our kids play & exchanged numbers. That lady has been a dear friend of mine ever since! I have some moms that don’t extend the ‘play date’ idea & that’s ok. Friendship is about putting yourself out there. Yes you’ll encounter moms that won’t respond but I believe God will put the right people across her path. Who knows maybe she’ll run across this person again. 😉

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