Marriage Monday: The Power of Kindness

Sometimes we have the least patience with those we live with.  We’re kinder to strangers than we are our spouse.  Today’s Marriage Monday is about the power of kindness.

Mark says…
We become so comfortable with those closest to us, that we often forget our manners.  We let our tongue go without regard to the feelings of those we love.

Jill says…
Without realizing it, we can compromise trust and break down intimacy in the relationship that is supposed to be the most important in our life.

Mark says…
Have you ever found yourself speaking harshly to your spouse when the conversation is suddenly interrupted by a phone call?  You pick up the phone and speak kindly to the person who is calling.  If you’ve ever found yourself in this situation, you know what we’re talking about today.

Jill says…
Kindness goes a long way in relationships.  Kindness can even happen in the midst of conflict.  It requires a lot of self-control, but it isn’t impossible.

Mark says…
What does kindness look like in everyday married life?  Here are just a few practical strategies:

  • Stop what you’re doing when your spouse walks in the door.  Greet him or her with a hug and kiss.
  • Say “yes” a lot more than “no” when your spouse asks for a favor or for help.
  • Be generous.  Share that last piece of pie or cookie with your spouse.
  • Listen with your eyes and your ears.  Give your spouse your full attention when they are talking to you.
  • Don’t interrupt your spouse, and always say “please” and “thank you” when speaking to your partner.
  • Respect your spouses opinions and thoughts…even if they are different than yours.
  • Tell your spouse “thank you” for even the smallest acts of kindness. Express appreciation as much as possible.
  • Don’t roll your eyes when your spouse says something you disagree with.
  • Watch your words.  Don’t let unkind comments come out of your mouth.
  • Speak to your spouse without a tone of disapproval or attitude in your voice.
  • Believe the best in your spouse.  What you think is communicated in your tone and body language.
  • Be helpful.  Offer to assist your spouse when they are working to accomplish a task that could be done faster if two people worked together.

Jill says…
In marriage, the little things really are the big things.  Small acts of kindness on a daily basis, say “I love you,” without ever uttering a word.

What about you?  What acts of kindness have said “I love you” in your marriage?

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3 Responses to Marriage Monday: The Power of Kindness

  1. michelle d says:

    What a wonderful reminder. :)

  2. diana w. says:

    Thank you Jill and Mark for your very true words.
    Listening with your eyes is the key for intimacy I guess. That is what I appreaciate the most when my husband does it.
    We usually play cards together when the kids are inbed. Be both are nearly addicted to this game. It is so fun and competetive to play against your husband.
    But this is the time I love the best. When he takes time to play this game with me.
    This is the “I love you” phrase from my husband.

    • JillSavage says:

      Diana,

      It sounds like you and your hubby have a good thing going! Good for you for stepping away from the television and computer and doing something face-to-face in the evening!