What Can I Do To Help?

ThinkstockPhotos-514105293Mark: Yesterday Jill and I spent the afternoon cleaning up from our garage sale. We boxed up the items that were left in order to donate them. Then we cleaned the garage. It was dirty work in many ways. I loved that she jumped right in and joined me.

Jill: Every few days we seem to have a huge garden harvest to take care of.  I’m spending hours preparing veggies for meals or the freezer.  I love when Mark comes in and says, “what can I do to help?”

Mark: As with most couples, Jill and I easily roll into our regular routines. Ours has always been that, in general, she takes care of most things inside the house and I take care of most things outside the house. It works for us. Yet, it’s important to break out of those molds and look beyond our usual roles.

Jill: It means the world to me when Mark “notices” I’m doing something extra and offers to help.  It helps me feel seen and let’s me know I’m not alone.

Mark: I appreciate when Jill is aware of what I’m doing and either jumps in and helps or even just brings me an ice cold drink in the midst of the hard work.

Jill: It’s easy to become “silos” under the same roof.  Each spouse tending to their own projects and responsibilities.  The more we cross over and help one another, the better it is for our relationship. We increase our interaction, awareness, and communication.

Mark: When we intentionally link arms and work as partners instead of individuals, it deepens our intimacy and strengthens our bond.

What about you? Where can you more intentionally interact with your spouse? How can you increase your awareness? 

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